If you have seen as many romcoms* as I have, you will readily recognize this phrase. And if you have not broken my (not particularly impressive) record, well, I must ask;
“Where is your feminine side?!”
Those eight words pop up when the bells ring and the hearts sing in anticipation of a walk down the aisle. The days of walking on air with stars twinkling in your eyes, fussing and fretting over every detail and trying desperately to make it less of a family jamboree and more of a day straight out of your preteen fantasies of ‘The Princess and Prince Charming.’
Soon enough life settles to the mundane. I think every other woman hits the ground with a thud at the realization that days cannot be spent stealing a couple of minutes to catch up with goings-on every hour before close of work.
And evenings are less of ‘fill-me-in-on-your-day’ and more of a race to beat traffic, light the stove, feed the clan, bond the clan, prep for tomorrow, hit the sack. Repeat.
Each half of the union has its task cut out, yes there are blurred lines which may be debated, but truth still is each one has its burden to carry. To carry it gracefully, happily and successfully is another matter.
My make-up as a woman automatically defines the way I will deliver on my part of the deal. It took some learning that yes, I am hooked to Mr. Right and Perfect; Yes, my universe revolves around him; Yes, I want to be his alter ego and he mine however the sanity of us both depends on me reducing my vice-grip on that dream.
To let him breathe, I must pass on some of my emotional connects to another. These connects, though he may try, he cannot really ever truly comprehend. Not from lack of caring, but just from a plain wiring point of view, he just gets perplexed by my highs and lows not matter how hard he tries!
I go quite when I am upset, expecting the poor guy to use his power of clairvoyance.
…to be cont’d